Countdown

Hey guys...I know you're out there! lol! Are you all laying low until 2018 is in the can? I don't blame you. It's been a rough year and I think most of us are hoping for a better 2019.

There is not much we can control in this world. Most everything happens randomly, whether we are prepared for it or not. But what is the one thing that.. technically.. we CAN control? You know what I'm leading up to. That's right. Our choices, especially when it comes to our choices about diet and exercise. No one force feeds us. No one holds us back when we want to move. We are free to make good choices for ourselves, regardless of what is going on around us. It is the one thing we can control...of should control. But, as we all know, controlling ourselves can be harder then controlling climate change or politics or the price of your cable bill!

It takes a lot to make a major life change, especially if you expect it to happen all at once. It won't. It happens one choice at a time. Baby steps. When babies are learning to walk, sometimes they fall, but have you ever seen a baby not immediately try to stand right back up? They never give up and neither should you! It doesn't matter how many times you have fallen. There is going to be a day when you are standing strong and feeling empowered and in charge of your choices. Food does not control you. Your thoughts do. Once you get your thoughts in line with your desires and goals, losing weight and getting fit will be your new obsession! I can 100% promise you that there is not one single bite of food, (or an entire buffet for that matter!)  that is worth sacrificing your quality of life.

So take these last few days of 2018 and really do some soul searching and truth seeking. Your personal truth about how you've managed yourself and your choices. How many excuses or justifications you've made. How many times you were filled with regret, promising yourself to do better and be stronger. The jabbering that goes on in our heads can feel chaotic at times, but truth is quiet, peaceful, forgiving, positive. I believe that honesty with self is more a part of succeeding at weight loss then willpower.

Enough of my ramblings. I hope you have all had a lovely holiday season and are ready to welcome in the New Year with hope and enthusiasm and determination, but most of all a desire to be truthful to yourself and the peaceful knowledge that you have everything you need to make your desires for weight loss and a healthy lifestyle a reality. HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Emotional Work

Doing Cambridge has it's own set of special emotions. It challenges our food issues, our sense of self esteem, our learned behaviors, conditioning from our youth, and so many other parts of our personalities. It's a LOT! Plus, eating is enjoyable and social and comforting...usually. Sometimes, for those of us with compulsive eating disorders, it can become a weapon of self destruction and loneliness. I remember my lowest times of my eating disorder, almost feeling like I was beating myself up with food. Probably sounds overly dramatic to those with lessor or different issues then I was dealing with, but it's the best way to describe what I was doing. It was a violent act against myself.

What I realized, as I progressed through this emotional maze of weight loss, was that 99% of my  viewpoint and my internal dialog was negative. I grew up a chubby kid and weight had ALWAYS been the focal point of my life. I visualized it like a wagon wheel, obesity being the hub and all other aspects of life branched off from it. Every choice I made in life had my obesity at it's center. There were no goals or ambitions made from a desire to lead a full and rewarding life. So many lost opportunities.

It was a process that took time, my emotional recovery. It was like building myself a new house to live in, brick by brick. Eventually, momentum kicked in and the bricks started seating themselves.

I consider myself a fully recovered compulsive addictive eater. That person is so far buried in my past, I can not even comprehend that was me. I still struggle with some things. I never did reach my ultimate goal of my high school weight. Not even close! lol!. But I have managed to maintain well enough to have made up for some of all those lost opportunities. The past 17 years have been some of the best, and most heartbreaking, but my miracle is that I have been able to experience these normal life events without turning to food or any other substance to cope. I'm happy about that.

If You're Thinking About Trying Cambridge Diet

Hello to anyone here searching for an answer to their weight issues. I am someone who has spent my entire life either knowing I was overweight, dieting trying to lose weight, giving up and eating like a fool, suffering serious health consequences for said foolishness, and finally...FINALLY  finding my way to a stable healthy weight and life.

I had used Cambridge back in the early 1980's when I was a young 20 something year old. Losing weight was not hard back then. Maintaining was elusive however! I kept it off for several years, but eventually slipped back to old habits and gained back all 80 lbs + more. I went back to trying diet after diet and not getting anywhere but discouraged.

Fast forward through a couple of pregnancies, a divorce, some health problems, and I eventually found myself at the age of 42 well over 300 lbs. It's been over 17 years now since I found Cambridge again and placed my order for 1 case of Original 330 Dutch Chocolate. I honestly didn't know if it was going to work. My body had become so weight loss resistant over the years and nothing seemed to be able to break through that. I was an emotional basket case when it came to food. It had always been a big ridiculous deal in my life and I was very weary of the never ending battle to control myself. My reservoir of hope was pretty much tapped out. But...I ordered and waited...and ate everything in my kitchen. My box came, I opened it and saw the familiar containers of Cambridge, and my hope started to bubble up again. 

I went on to lose over 120 pounds in less then 6 months. It was a total life changer. I've used Cambridge these past 17 years as a maintenance tool. No more losing and gaining it all back. If I notice a few pounds creeping back on, I simply go back to my dependable Cambridge for a day or so to get rid of it ASAP.

Don't talk yourself out of trying this. Cambridge has a money back guarantee for first time customers of a 30 Day Plan. Give it a month and get ready to be thrilled with your results. If you're not happy with it for any reason, return for a refund..no big deal. But just FYI..of the thousands of new customers I start each year, I get MAYBE 2 to 4 returns. People love what Cambridge does for them and I think you will too. Contact me for info or to get started.

Day 5.5 And My Breakfast Brownie!

This morning I made a chocolaty brownie for my breakfast. Oops! I meant a chocolaty CAMBRIDGE brownie!I didn't measure anything so I may not be able to duplicate it, but this thing was delicious! In fact, my very picky son came out of his room and said, "Did you make brownies?" lol!

Basically I took an egg white (17 cal) and whisked it up until frothy. I added a scoop of my perfect blend 330 Rich/Dutch Chocolate Cambridge, then about a T of cocoa powder (12 Cal) and the same amount of Splenda. I added about 1/4 t of baking powder and about 1 T of sugar free mocha coffee flavored creamer (20 cal). I also plopped in about 1/2 tsp of melted coconut oil (18 cal). It made a thick pasty dough/batter. Then I had to decide how to cook/bake it. I patted it in to a large thick cookie size. I first put it in a skillet with a little cooking spray with a lid on the pan. I thought this was a good idea but then realized it was burning too quickly on the bottom. I turned it over on to a little microwave safe plate and finished it off in the micro. As soon as it was firm to touch I took it out. It only took a few seconds. I let it cool completely as that definitely improves the flavor of the chocolate Cambridge baked items. Oh my goodness! This was so delicious! The texture was perfect and the flavor was spot on. In all I added about 67 calories to my total. I won't be adding anything else to my shakes today so that is within my allowed additions.

I don't have any of the Oats at the moment (should be getting my order this coming week, yay!) which is my normal go to SSing breakfast. I usually make my Super Oats pancakes and I just wasn't in the mood to have a shake in this morning . But a brownie? YES PLEASE!

Long time, No blogging

Hey everyone! It's been a while since I last wrote anything here. I've had a lot going on in my family that has kept me distracted from my normal life. These past few months have been very challenging for me and as people tend to do, I have been less then on top of things diet wise. I had my gall bladder surgery in Feb and the recovery was not fun, but now I'm feeling good in that regard. But..like some do...I managed to gain some weight post-op. My appetite was on fire and I probably doubled what I normally eat! Well..maybe not double..but enough to put back on the 8 pounds I had lost the week before surgery and probably another 10 on top of that! EEEK!!I also had to put down my much loved cat of 18 years, Mitzie. It was heartbreaking and added to all the other emotional issues going on.

So..now I am ready to get control of things again. I decided to begin Cambridge SS mid-day today. Not tomorrow morning like people typically do. I like to start for Dinner and then that way I get to sleep through a lot of the first 24 hours! Brilliant, right?

In a couple of weeks our pool should be at swimming temp. I am looking forward to having the exercise. But first I have to be able to get in my swim suit so thank goodness for Cambridge! Here is a pic of my beautiful Mitzie. The most wonderful cat in the world. I miss her terribly.

Ok 2017..I'm ready for ya!

It's been a while since I posted anything to my blog. My apologies  for that. I do write quit a bit for my Support Board and my FaceBook page, so I hope you all take time to visit there. But being as how this is a blog, and they tend to be a little more personal at times, I decided to come here to share what my plan is for this new year that is rapidly approaching.

Like most everyone, I have overdone it with the holiday eating. Yes, I know better, but I also know it's not a death sentence because I have my beloved Cambridge to rescue me! My son and his lovely girlfriend have temporarily moved in with us and their eating habits are typical for most 20 something's. Lots of sugar, fried fast foods, pizza, and...well..you get the idea. My son likes to cook and bake and I've been lax in my normally strict eating habits. So..like all of you, I will be beginning my Cambridge Diet damage control come January. Well...I'm actually going to start right after Christmas. I feel sluggish and uncomfortable with the weight I've gained. I have a very small window with extra weight and I feel it right away. Not good.

Will you join me?

We Are The Champions!

With the Olympics in full swing we are all impressed with the physical and mental strength of these exceptional athletes. They can seem super human, but we are all made out of the same stuff. The only difference is in the unwavering commitment and focus on a goal. We may not be aspiring to a gold medal and representing our country, but we are aspiring to something just as great in our own life and the lives of the people who love us. Committing to putting your health as your #1 priority can seem selfish when you have other people depending on you like family and friends, but in reality the most unselfish thing you could ever do for them is to be as healthy and happy as you can be. Just like being part of an Olympic team. If one member loses their drive, the whole team suffers. Don't let your team down! Start working towards your goal like it was your job!

Changes And Challenges

If there's one thing that life teaches us.. it's that it happens while we are busy making plans.

We come to the beginning of our Cambridge journey with a common plan, to lose the weight and get healthy. We have no way of knowing what twists and turns our life may take along the way, and it can get pretty twisted at times! When you consider all that is required of us to succeed at this, it is not unlike a master juggler keeping all his objects in the air, even if the floor tilts or someone tosses in a few more items to the mix. It's no small task and requires a whole new collection of skills and practice.

Typically, when faced with challenges, we would self medicate with food and ignore a lot of the emotional and physical issues we are dealing with. "Drug of choice" and all that. Being stripped of that coping tool can cause some panic with the realization of how dependent we have become on comfort eating, or how much in denial we may be about our personal struggles. While you may have been prepared for the physical demands of being on a restricted diet, you probably were caught unprepared for the emotional ones.

As you begin, (or continue) your Cambridge experience, go in to it knowing that at times you will be required to face emotions you may want to pacify with food, or you may suddenly be faced with a health crisis that you will want to escape from temporarily by self medicating in the same way. These old habits and behaviors need to be removed from your arsenal of coping tools. Finding their replacement is part of the goal when changes and challenges come your way.

Research On Biggest Loser Contestants

The research that has been done with cast members of season 8 "Biggest Loser" has been interesting to say the least. Scientists followed 14 of the 16 contestants of the Biggest Loser for 6 years to try and understand why all but one of them gained the weight back, some even heavier then they were before the show. Their findings support what the obese community has known all along. The over simplification of "eat less, move more" and you will be thin is contrary to what was found. Also, the concept of the metabolism slowing down is being clarified.

It's valuable for dieters to understand going in to weight loss what their long term lifestyle will be to maintain it. It's also time we stop body shaming people who lose and then regain their weight. It's like shaming someone for limping after breaking their leg. Science has proven that for many, if not most of successful dieters, our metabolisms remain compromised and it is up to us to find that delicate balance of nutrition, activity, and acceptance of our circumstances to maintain a healthy weight, mind, and body.

https://www.yahoo.com/gma/video/biggest-loser-contestants-open-continuing-061725406.html

We Gain Weight One Bite At A Time

Which Comes First?

It always interests me how the same person can have very different experiences doing the exact same diet at different times. The only thing that changes is the person's mind.

Typically, when we begin any diet, the first thing we do is clean out all the food that may distract us or tempt us. We purge the kitchen (as much as the family will allow) and try to clear the calendar of events where food will be the center focus. We plan our necessary grocery shopping trips and try to avoid those places we may have previously stopped for fast food etc. We structure our environment as best as we can to set ourselves up for success, but we completely forget that while purging the external world of distractions, it is our mind that is the control room of our behavior.

Just as a person purges their living space of distractions, replacing them with healthy alternatives, we need to purge our minds of negative distracting thoughts, replacing them with positive, forward thinking, progressively determined thoughts.

We can't always control our environment, but we can control our reaction to it and that is one of the keys to a successful weight loss, and just as important, a successful maintenance.

Day 16 of Sole Source (SS)

I decided back on the 15th to get back on SS to lose some weight that I had been accumulating since my vacation back in Oct. My husband and I went down south to the Florida Keys and I was in vacation mode. I pretty much ate whatever he did and while that has no effect on him, for me it was probably more then twice what I would normally consume.  With that and the holidays, I got kind of lax in my dietary habits and some weight had crept on while I was looking the other way. My pants were tight and that's my signal for getting my act together. So, along with a great group of people on my Support Board, ( http://members5.boardhost.com/pam140/ ) I jumped on the SS train and I've been going strong!

I made the decision not to weigh when I started. I didn't want a number to mess with my head and I figured it really didn't matter anyway. In fact, I have not weighed at all! Yes, 16 days and I have absolutely no idea how much I've lost or what I weigh. I'm feeling kind of free because of it! No judge and jury staring up at me from the scale every morning. No number in my head telling me how I should feel about myself and if I was going to have a good day or a bad one. I am stresslessly going about my days knowing that I am doing everything I can possibly do to allow my body to lose the weight. It's a different approach, especially for me since I tend to be a meticulous chart keeper.

About a  year and a half ago I had set a goal to get back to my high school weight by my 56th birthday. Well..I didn't get there.  Now my 57th is just 19 days away. I won't make that goal in 19 days, but I'm determined I will be on my way there!

Starting Sole Source Today

I made the decision to jump back on SS for a while to lose the extra pounds I've gained since Oct. We went on vacation and then we had the holidays...well...no explanation needed. My pants are tight and fortunately I have my beloved Cambridge to come to my rescue once again! I just had my first shake for the day, the one I call my "Favorite Blend". I take one full container of 330 Rich Chocolate and mix it in a big Tupperware bowel with a container of 330 Original Dutch Chocolate. This gives me the creamy thick texture of the Rich shake along with the deeper chocolate taste of the Dutch. I add about 1/4 cup of cocoa powder and mix it all together. Voila! Perfection! To make it even more dreamy, I keep a jar of brewed decaf coffee in the fridge and use that along with a couple of ice cubes in place of the water. Now we're talkin'!

So I figure I'm going to give it a couple of weeks and then decide if I want to start adding food back to my diet. I'm looking forward to that wonderful feeling of lightness and clarity that being in ketosis gives. This will be fun!
Cheers!

Maintenance?

Like most, I have lost and gained the same weight so many times over my life that I could never put a number to it. The gaining part took no effort what so ever. The losing part seemed like endless sacrifice. Maintenance? Hmm...now that was an interesting concept. From childhood on I was either losing or gaining...never maintaining. My body didn't do maintenance. Dieting=weight loss. Eating=weight gain. Those were the two options. 

So needless to say, these past 15 years of figuring out how to not gain the 120+ pounds I had lost back.. has been as labor intensive as anything I did to get here. My body is so prone to weight gain that for me, maintenance requires vigilance and effort. I wish I could say that my body was "healed" from being a fat storing machine, but that wouldn't be true. If I deviate from my normal controlled eating plan for more then an occasional meal now and then, I will gain. If I take a break for a week and  eat like everyone else around me is eating, including people who are not overweight, I will gain. And it's not necessarily the calorie count that is the issue, but the food itself that will cause the weight gain. 

Grain based foods and sugar are the welcome mat in front of my fat cells. My insulin spikes and every calorie gets locked away like squirrels storing nuts for the winter.  On top of that, eating them also awakens the sleeping beast that is appetite and hunger. Uncontrolled type 2 diabetics can have a voracious appetite that is beyond anything imaginable. As far as you body is concerned, it is starving, no matter how much you consume. Obesity is the natural result.  

It is my JOB to be mindful of the food I consume and I know that each choice comes with consequence for me, good or bad. Because I am diabetic, I have a built in alarm system that fires if I go astray for more then the occasional deviation from my normal diet. I will feel like crap! I keep my blood sugar and insulin levels under control with lifestyle choices, but when I choose something different, BAM! Diabetic Pam!  

It frustrates me to accept the fact that I will never be"normal", whatever that is. I'm still not sure how "normal" people go about their lives. Do they just naturally run checks and balances in their heads constantly to keep their weight and health on track? I know that's how I live now. I generally know the caloric and nutritional value of everything I put in my mouth and I keep a running tally in my head. I see other people eating breads and sugary deserts and know that I can't have it. Let me rephrase that, I choose not to have it. Do I want it? You know I do, but if I want to stay on this planet with all my original parts and be healthy, I have to say "No". That is maintenance for me.

Easy To Be Cruel

Last night my 32 yr old Daughter needed to go shopping so she went to Walmart, the only store open late in our area. While she was there she texted me this message, "Two young guys just walked past me and one made a puking sound at me". She added, " They were probably about 20 yrs old.

Most people think my daughter is in her early 20's. She says it is one of the perks of being overweight. She tries to have a good self esteem in spite of her weight, and was actually feeling especially confident yesterday due to finally getting a good job after a couple of years of unemployment. She's been able to buy new clothes and take better care of herself. Then, two jackasses cross her path and lob an emotional grenade at her, a direct hit. As they walked away laughing at their mutual brilliance, she was left standing there humiliated, hurt, and angry.

This has been her life since she was about 8 yrs old. My daughter has battled being 200 pounds or more over weight most of her life. It creates an interesting dynamic between her and I. Here I am, the "Cambridge Lady" who spends her days helping other people lose weight and deal with the emotional luggage they carry, and I can't help my daughter. My heart breaks for her. Every time some thoughtless idiot does something like this to her...well...so many feelings.

I had my share of abusive behaviors directed at me and my weight over my life. Each one of them is branded in my memory. Beginning as a 3 year old being told I was too chubby to eat what my siblings ate, to being made fun of in the playground and feeling like I had to run faster and play harder then the skinny kids, to having young guys yell "Ya ever heard of Jenny Craig!" out their car window at me as they drove by, to having a neighbor in my apartment complex that would "Oink" every time I had to walk past his door to get to the stairs.

My daughter is a force to be reckoned with. She puts on a confident and together facade, but I know she is suffering in silence. This morning I saw that she had posted on her FaceBook page. It read, "Two young guys just walked past me at Walmart and one made a puking sound at me. Either I'm super gross, or he is. I was actually totally feeling awesome today. Clearly the issue was with him cuz I'm fierce as eff.

Good girl

Why Cambridge Was My Success Story (finally!)

As I have shared before, I spent most of my life, beginning in toddlerhood, on a diet. I was born chubby (9lbs, 3oz) and I was always aware of the fact that I was different from my three thin siblings. Going through life constantly mindful of every bite of food you take and labeling it "good" or "bad" can really mess up any chance of feeling normal.

Going on Weight Watchers at the age of 9 with my mother was my reality. I was the only kid there in a room full of adults. I can't count the number of times we started and stopped that diet. We would lose some weight, and then gain it back...over and over. The meetings and weigh ins were torture. I can remember how labor intensive it was to follow back then with the counting, weighing, measuring, substituting, and generally having to choke down weird tasteless food. Yuck!

Now, many of you may not be old enough to have been on WW in the early days. It was very structured and detailed. I have to give most of the credit to my mom for the amount of work involved since she did the cooking. Once I got older I took over some of the kitchen duty and it was an enormous pain. It took up the whole day, planning meals and special prep work, making sure we had our weekly meals planned including the mandatory servings of liver and fish and veal, etc. I came to the conclusion early in life that dieting makes a person even MORE obsessed with food! Not the result you are looking for when you are already giving way to much of your time and attention to it.

I was poking around on the Internet this morning and came across this article that has the old original WW plan as I remember it from the 60's/70's. Maybe you can see why Cambridge was such a miracle for me and others who were completely burned out on conventional weight loss plans. This is long, but unbelievably and intensely detailed! Not unlike most weight loss plans that have you accounting for each bite of food you take. Cambridge's simplicity is the reason I was finally able to succeed at losing my weight and keeping it off for the past 14 years.

Here is the Weight Watchers original plan. You will be even more grateful for Cambridge. Click on the link below and prepare to be amazed!

http://www.dwlz.com/WWinfo/old1972ww.html

Which Step Have You Reached Today?

Just A Few More Days

For those that are waiting to get Christmas over to once again commit to their weight loss program, it's only a few more days. If you're waiting until after the New Year, well...that's another story. Always waiting for the perfect time to diet is pointless as there is always another holiday or event coming up. Trying to make progress in between can mean  a lot of effort for not a lot of progress. Don't waste those in between days. Make them count too. 5 days of work is not cancelled out by one day of play, as long as you give it your best.

Jan 1st will be here soon enough and then for the most part, the excuses dry up for a while. For those who are SSing or attempting to and making progress, or even just maintaining (which is also an accomplishment!) well done! Real life demands that we make tough choices and sacrifice what we want in the moment, for what we want most in the future.

A Thanksgiving Poem I wrote for my Support Board

It's the night before Thanksgiving
And all through the board
Not a dieter was posting
Not one single word

The blenders are quiet
The posters are too
I had good intentions
But what's a dieter to do?

The family is here
The whole country is cooking
I so badly want to sample
When no one is looking

My head starts to spin
My heart starts to pound
My commitment to diet
Is nowhere to be found.

I know what to do
I know what is best
I know I'm important
But temptation's a pest

When Thanksgiving is over
And Friday begins
I want to count pounds lost
Instead of my sins

So take THAT you stuffed turkey!
Away with you food
My health's more important
I choose  to do good!

Whatever your plan
Whatever you choose
Keep your best interest in mind
And you will not lose!

(except pounds of course!)

Happy Thanksgiving !

Recovery, It's a Good Thing

So I am now 95% back to normal after my flu virus or whatever evil thing it was that slammed me this past week. Sadly, my family is all sick with it, but at lease I am well enough now to take care of them if they need me.

In the midst of my viral misery, I thought about how much I take for granted now.. and how much I am in denial about. Some years back there wasn't a second of any day that I wasn't sick and in pain from my obesity. It was 24/7. It's a dim enough memory now that I forget what it's like to not be able to do what I want without thinking. Jumping up to answer my phone, walking endless hours at Disney World with my husband, knowing that I can go anywhere out to eat and not worry about fitting in a booth, going grocery shopping and not feeling judged. Normal everyday stuff that used to be on my "Too much effort" list. It was a long list. Now I live my life with few limitations and I don't take that for granted. I doubt I ever will. I hope I never do.

The denial part is where it gets real. Are you ready for this? Am I ready for this? I am not thin. I am not at my ideal weight. I am technically still considered overweight by the charts that be. I'm a little pissed about that. Who are "they" to tell me I am overweight? If I feel good and I am enjoying my life, why isn't that good enough? Why do I or anyone else have to fall in line with a chart that declares us worthy? Why? Well...I know why. Because these charts are not to judge us or tell us we are too fat to wear white jeans. These charts are to tell us that our current weight puts us in a category of health risk common for the average individual who is our weight, height, gender, and age.  I am still very much at risk. In fact, considering my health history, it's a no brainer that I am still very much in the danger zone of diabetes and heart disease. It's in not only my own health history, but several generations of my genealogy.

My ultimate goal for this year is to get to my high school weight. This would put me in the lower range of the weight charts for best health benefits. Now, when I was a teenager, I was active, not to mention...a teenager! Even though I had always struggled with weight, my metabolism was a whole lot better at 17 then it is now. Knowing this, I need to get my head out of the sand and get busy. I have made a few temporary attempts at my goal, but let's face it, 55, almost 56, is plenty old enough to realize I don't have all of the time in the world to prevent some major health disaster from crashing in on me. My sister died last year from pulmonary hypertension. She was one year older then I am now. My Mom died at 62 from congestive heart failure. I've already had that before. There is vascular disease and heart disease and other serious risk factors including my own battle with diabetes that is REAL! Very real.

So tomorrow I begin again. I have a few months until my 56th B-day. I want to be at my ultimate goal. Wish me success!