All Or Nothing

I think "all or nothing" thinking is something most of us can relate to. Trying to figure out what's at the core of it may be different for each person, but it will be the reason for failure for all. No one can be perfect and fortunately,no one needs to be. I learned that the key to succeeding was to get honest with myself and acknowledge the fact that my "all or nothing" thinking was self sabotage. On some level, I was looking for a reason to judge myself and then give up. Instead of taking responsibility for my actions and working to overcome my weaknesses, I used them as an excuse to not keep going.

It went against a lifetime of negative self talk and low self esteem for me to not give up on myself and my diet. I had a few episodes during my weight loss where I lost all control and had a full out binge. I hated myself for it and it fueled my belief that I was hopeless. I recognized the truth that this was my pattern, trying, self sabotaging, hating myself, and giving up. Not too productive! No wonder I never got anywhere.

This time I was determined not to repeat old behaviors. This is what I did when I went off track. Once I became aware of what I was doing, and sometimes that happened after a few bites, or sometimes it didn't happen until the kitchen was empty, I would take a moment and make an effort NOT to begin the emotional self flogging, I would forgive myself, brush off the crumbs, tell myself it never happened and then continue on as if it hadn't. I would have my next scheduled Cambridge meal and continue on. Some may call this denial, but in reality it was a method of healing for me. I was gradually breaking those dysfunctional behaviors and habits, my "all or nothing" thinking.

You are on a journey and it will have twists and turns. Just keep moving forward and see everything as a positive learning experience. No successful person ever practiced perfectionism or "all or nothing" thinking. They practice resiliency.